Inspiration

What do you do when someone picks a label or descriptor for you and you aren't certain about its accuracy?

I had the privilege to serve as a tutor/counselor for the Luther College Upward Bound Summer Program after my Junior and Senior years of college.  Apparently, I did well enough then that I was asked to help as a faculty person some years later when we lived in Decorah.  To say that my first Summer Program experience was a significant growth experience would not be an understatement - and that was as a tutor-counselor, not a student.  I have since witnessed exactly how much the Luther College UB experience meant to many people who were fortunate to be a part of that program and had the privilege to be mentored by some truly outstanding people.

Some outstanding people

My first UB Summer Program as a tutor/counselor was after my Junior year in college.  At that time, the permanent UB staff at Luther consisted of Melanie Hoffner, Laurie Cottingham and Phyllis Gray.  In addition to these three, Dave Hunt was a staff member who had significant experience with the Upward Bound program.  To say that I think highly of these people would be a bit of an understatement. But, there is no way to quantify the respect and gratitude I have for their efforts on behalf of disadvantaged youth in Northeast Iowa over the years.  So, I'll just leave it at that.

My motivation for returning to this subject was the passing of Phyllis Gray last November.  If you are one of the many who interacted with Phyllis during her life-time, you have been given a special blessing.  If you are not one of those people, you can have some hope that maybe you will be privileged to meet her in the next.  Phyllis was a creative personality who somehow managed to provide a consistent and stable foundation for a long line of struggling young people to stand on.  Phyllis was very clear that everyone had responsibility for their actions.  She could be stern and enforce consequences without making the students she was dealing with feel that she didn't care.  In fact, that was one of the most obvious things about her - she cared.  Phyllis was strong, confident and capable and she wanted the students in her program to become their own versions of strong, confident and capable.  Did Phyllis Gray have faults?  Of course she did, and she was the first to admit it.  But, she would also point out that the way we overcome those faults and shortcomings is also part of what makes us who we are.

So, what do you do when someone like Phyllis, along with Melanie, David and Laurie, decide that the word to describe you at the end of your first Summer as a staff person for Upward Bound is "Inspire?"

Phyllis' explanation for it was that I was a generally quiet person, being one of the strongest introverts in a group that featured many extroverts.  But, sometimes I would offer up an opinion and people would listen.  And, then I would stop talking and looked a little surprised at myself.  There was also some commentary about how students responded to me, which was gratifying as well.  But... why "inspire" exactly?

Looking back on it, I have to say that I can't ever tell exactly if I have ever been truly inspiring to anyone.  That's fine, since I think it would be awfully presumptuous of me to assume I have done anything in particular for anyone else that was inspiring.  On the other hand, I can say that I have always believed in the concept of the 'self-fulfilling prophesy.'  The idea is that if someone labels a young person (or any person) as a failure, that young person is more likely to meet that criteria.  On the other hand, if you tell them they are capable or fun to be around, guess what?  They just might start really believing positive things about themselves and they might want to pursue that characteristic as a life goal. 

This makes me wonder if this was just another gift that I was given while I was involved in the Luther College UB Program?  A gift of a life goal to be inspired and to inspire in whatever ways seem best as I travel through this life.

In the end, it doesn't matter whether it was a description of what some people I respect saw in me or if it was a gift of a goal that I should reach for.  What matters is that I can be counted among those who was given something valuable by some good people.  And I am grateful for it.