When I Grow Up

"What are you going to do when you grow up?"

I don't know if it still holds true today, but I bet it does.  One of the common approaches used to get school children to write was to ask them a question about themselves.  Giving them a chance to write a couple of sentences and draw a picture of what they see themselves doing when they are older seemed like a pretty safe exercise.

I recall that each time that question was posed to me in elementary school, I came up with a different answer.  And, I bet most of my answers were pretty typical for a child of that age to select.  After all, how much understanding does a person who is six years old have of any potential occupation?  Considering how many of the Peanuts (Charles M Schulz) books I read and re-read, I wouldn't be surprised if I thought about doing World War I Flying Ace on a Sopwith Camel at some point.

Somewhere along the line - probably about fourth grade - that question disappeared for a while.  Perhaps it would show up when an adult who didn't know me was searching for something to say to make polite conversation with a kid.  And, that's probably about the time many kids were figuring out that they really did not know what they wanted to do when they grew up and the question was no longer as innocuous as it once was.

Of course, "what are you going to do when you grow up" started to take on a new meaning in high school.  Now, there was actually a little bit (or maybe a lot) of pressure that came along with the question.  People expected you to have some sort of direction or inkling of a plan.  And, as you progressed through high school and maybe college, the question changed to "WHEN are you going to grow up?"

At some point after that a strange thing happens.  You are the youngest adult involved in an activity, or at work, or some other sort of thing and you do a pretty good job on a particular task - perhaps better than a "rookie" is expected to do normally.  And someone responds with some variation of "what are you going to do when you grow up?"

Now, it's a compliment of a sort.  You've exceeded expectations and maybe there is a hint that you will go on to do something truly amazing in that field or workplace.  

And that's often the last time you'll hear it applied to you.  Even if you feel like you are still in the process of "growing up."

What do I want to do when I grow up?

I want to exercise a playful attitude and a joyful spirit, things that often seem to come more easily to us when we are six.  I want to learn - and then learn some more - even though there isn't as much that is completely new to me as there was when I was nine.  I want to take the time and energy to be awed and react with wonder to the world around us.  I want a butterfly landing on my hand now to still hold the thrill it did when I was seven.

I want the big heart that so many eight year-olds seem to have and the lust for life that most who are five years of age exhibit.  But, despite my words that say I want some of these characteristics that kids often show, I am not saying that I want to be that age again.  Instead, I appreciate the experiences I have had and I want to integrate them with playfulness and joy, a thirst for learning and a willingness to experience awe and wonder, and a heart and soul that sees life as a gift that we share with others.

So, what are you going to do when you grow up?