Thursday, January 21, 2021

The Spider in the Door Returns

 Once upon a time, there was a door.

Hello!  I am a door.

This door was a very humble door that came from very humble beginnings.  In fact, it was so humble that it was simply glad it had a beginning and that it had not yet reached an end.  Unless, of course, you considered that it was at the end of a hallway that led to a room.  In that case, it was certainly fine with ends since it was also a beginning.  It was the beginning of a room where chickens lived.

And chickens believe they are the beginning and the ending of all.

The door wasn't very pretty.  And, it was sometimes embarrassed that it didn't have a proper latch or that it didn't have a sturdy frame.  In fact, there was another door nearby that was much more attractive.  And, it didn't hold back with criticism when it wanted to feel superior.

 But, the humble door had a job.  And, that job had to be done.  And it was happy to do it.

When his unfriendly neighbor door was opened, the chickens could go outside.  But, if our humble yellow door wasn't there, the chickens would ignore the outside and they would explore the rest of the building.  This was not good, and the humble door knew this.

So, it used its makeshift latch.  And, it stood proudly in its rickety frame.

And, the chickens went outside.
Then, one day....

a spider built a web in the doorway!

 Cubbie the cat saw the spider in the doorway and she said,
"I would rather have a picnic than worry about a spider in the door."

And, Mrranda the cat looked at the spider in the door and then she said,

"I would rather see what the humans left me for dinner..."

"... than worry about a spider in the door."

The Sandman saw the spider in the door and he declared,

"I will eat the farmers' peach pie, rather than worry about a spider in the door..."

"I, the Sandman, have spoken."
The Sandman talked like that all of the time.  The spiders, chickens, both doors, Cubbie and Mrranda all kind of thought this way of talking was silly.  But, they agreed that peach pie did sound rather nice.

And, the farmers hid the peach pie from the Sandman.

Unfortunately, the farmers forgot about Kieran.  Kieran liked peach pies.  And, Kieran knew how to get inside the farm house.

So, Kieran ate the peach pie.
And, there was still a spider in the door.

And, it made the humble door unhappy.

The humble door had another purpose, other than keeping the chickens from going where they shouldn't.  The humble door opened and closed to allow the farmers to go to the end of the hall so they could enter the beginning of the chicken room.  But, the farmers did not want to disturb the spider, so they used yet ANOTHER door to get into the chicken room.  This door lost no time in taunting the humble door.

And, the door was sad.
The farmers were sad too, because they had no more peach pie.  But, the door didn't care about that.  After all, what would a door want with a peach pie?
So, the sad, humble door cried.

and it echoed around inside the building.
Another spider heard the sound and yelled,

"Hey!  Keep it down, you're scaring away the flies!"

The humble door apologized. And, since the spider really was a pretty decent spider, as far as that goes, it inquired what was making the door so sad.  The door opened up to the spider (that's a pun, get it?) and told the spider about its problem.

"Well," said the spider, "you're in luck!  My sister's sister is a realtor.  And she told me about this nice web just 10 feet from here that is ready for immediate occupation!"

"What does 'immediate occupation' mean?" asked the humble door.  After all, the poor door had never gone to school.  So, it really is a bit much to expect it to know such big words!

"Immediate occupation means....

"The spider in the door can move to a new web right now!"
"It is priced right!" said the spider. "And....

it has a nice view!"
Meanwhile, the farmers made a second peach pie and ate it before Kieran could find it.  Cubbie, Mrranda and Sandman ate the picnic lunch the farmers neglected while they were eating the peach pie.  Kieran was still full from his peach pie, so he didn't care about the lunch or the second pie.  Two spiders were happily wrapping up flies in their webs and the realtor spider took a check to the bank after making a very quick sale.

And the humble door?  It continues to be pleased that it could do its job being an end and a beginning all at the same time.  In fact, it is more content now than it has ever been.

Do you know why?

Because it likes stories that have happy endings.
I had some fun finding older posts from prior years in the same month at the tail end of last year.  There is a fair amount of entertaining writing there that probably never gets visited, so I thought I'd use Thursdays for "Throwback" posts for the next couple of months.  The original for this post was January 13, 2015.

The cast of characters is, of course, different than it was then.  For example, Kieran only worked on the farm for one year.  But, it is actually a little startling to realize that our feline cast of Cubbie, Sandman and Mrranda have all left for the Eternal Hunting Grounds.  The chickens and spiders all still here - but different generations.

But, the door?  The door remains.  And the door is still happy.


  1. Ah, what a nice story.

  2. I like happy endings, too.

  3. I like the door!

  4. What a wonderful little story (and parable) -- and quite funny too!

  5. Thank you for the compliments. I enjoyed writing this one very much.

  6. I was just waiting for a terrible pun at the end of the story. I figured there had to be a pun with a door, a spider, and a peach pie! But alas, no pun. Maybe this story is not just at an end but also a beginning for more punny stories?


Thank you for your input! We appreciate hearing what you have to say.