The Whatsit

Back in 2016, we shared a photo of this farm implement on Facebook.  Then, we asked people to give us ideas about creative uses.  I just happened to run across the post when I was looking for something else and found it amusing - so I thought I would reshare!

The original post:  

Soon, this will be put to use. So, how shall we use it? Be creative!

The mayhem that followed:

Nancy D -  Some kind of chipmunk torture device?

Jeff C -  Picking pea pods, before they break the surface?

Keith K - I used one identical to this, as a kid, on my parents farm for digging potatos. It's an old potato plow (meant to be pulled by a horse), modified for a tractor. Maybe you know this. I just got excited when I saw the picture.

GFF's Response to Keith: 
Keith...you're not supposed to be accurate, just creative.
Everyone ignore Keith! Keep being creative. Keith K - Crab grass filtration device. Dress it up into a scarecrow for Fall. Cloths drying rack on top, boot dryer on bottom. I'm done. (that's the spirit Keith! We know Keith and realized he could take a nice chiding.)

Susan C - a device for slinging turkey manure into your neighbors fields...

Theri V -  It looks like it could be a big, scoop-billed bird with big whacky eyes!

Keith K -  hook it to a zip-line, and provide rides at the farm. (Boy, I tell ya, get the guy started....)

GFF - Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Now we're having fun! If the zip line was lined up with a row of potatoes.....

Glen E -  A gold finder

Michael P - It should definitely involve a cello bow, an amplifier, and a full moon. (how'd he know we both played cello?)

Melissa J - Looks like a catapult. Aren't the turkeys getting to the obnoxious teen phase? Threaten to launch them into the corn fields! (no animals were harmed in the making of this comment)

Ryan D -  we all know plants grow better with music, it is an oversized thumb harp called a Hypogaea Harp. Best played in the fall to get the one last upward spurt out of the plants before harvest.

Theri V - How about a giant robot head to go up against your new pergola?  Like the "Bad Robot" at the end of some of the TV shows, like Lost.

We're glad so many people had some fun with this and we hope others enjoy the responses as well.  

Do you have other ideas?  Respond to this post and share them.  Or, if you can't get the comment feature to work and still want to share, use the contact us form at the right side of the blog and we'll add it to the comments for you!

Have a good Friday everyone!

12 Things You Didn't Know About the Genuine Faux Farm

I thought I would revisit a blog mini-series we called "Ode to Clickbait!"   It's Saturday, we're supposed to have a little bit of fun with the weekend blogs, aren't we?

Wait?  You don't know what clickbait is?  Well, let's start with that first:

Clickbait is a title or link that intentionally over-promises OR misrepresents in order to pull people to a particular website.  The idea is to give you a sensational headline that you just can't resist so you come read our blog!  But, to fully qualify as clickbait - we're supposed to fail to deliver on what we promise with the headline.

I already have a problem with that.  I just might have to rethink this.

Other characteristics for click bait?  Content is usually short (under 300 words).  

Uh oh.

They often steal content from other sites and very little is original.  Uh oh again.

Maybe we'll just stick with click-bait-like titles for a few posts and see if we can have some fun with it.

Here we go!  12 Things you might not have known about the Genuine Faux Farm.

1. We are not "Faux Farms"

We ARE the Genuine Faux Farm, honest and for true.  Please note two things about the name.

First, we are only ONE farm.  

The "s" is not applicable to us.  We own only one small farmstead of about 15 acres, which hardly puts us in the same category of organizations that have gathered multiple farm-sites under its farm name.  If you would like for us to become "Farms,"  please contact us about the 50 acres of prime veggie growing or turkey pasture raising land that you will donate to us so we can make the "s" applicable.   Or, you could just remove the "s."  

Choices... choices.

Second, we are the GENUINE Faux Farm.  

If we're Faux Farm, then we are either just fake/false or incapable of creativity because we'd just be using our last name for our farm name.  Hey!  Look at this blog post!  Creativity abounds!  Please let us be a little bit clever and give our "Genuine Faux Farm" name a chance.  It's a small thing to do in order to build up our confidence.  You can still roll your eyes after you say it - especially if you do that while reading the blog because we can't see you. 

Or can we?   Hmmmmmmm.   NOW, I've got your attention!

2. Our farm has been producing food since 2004 and blog posts since 2008.

A picture is worth a thousand words, but on our farm - we'll do both a picture AND a thousand words with our blogs.  This is very much against the standard operation procedures for click bait.  

I am really BAD at this.  And, I'm actually proud of that.  Go figure.

Since we've already broken some (or maybe all) of the rules of click-bait, we'll just go ahead and break them more thoroughly by providing real information.  We moved to the farmstead during the Summer of 2004 from Chokio, Minnesota where Rob worked at the University of Minnesota-Morris as a college professor in the Computer Science Discipline.  We moved to Tripoli so Tammy could take a job at Wartburg College as a professor of Social Work.  We actually received permission to plant a veggie garden at the new place before we had officially purchased it.

That might give you an idea as to some of our priorities in life.

7. We know how to count.

See!  I toad you so!

3. Kohlrabi Yes, Fennel No

When we are asked what we grow, we often answer with either "everything from A to Z" or "name a vegetable."  It's true that we do grow asparagus and zucchini, but we have to cheat a little with "Q" by saying we grow Quadrato asti Giallo bell peppers and we have no idea what to do with "X."

When we offer the "name a vegetable" option, we usually get a fairly common answer that is easy to say yes to... Tomato?  Yes.  Green Beans?  Yes.  Onions?  Yes.

Sometimes, a person will get clever and try "Kohlrabi?"  Why?  Because it sounds fun and the plants look kind of weird.  And, we can still say "yes" to it because we have actually grown several types of kohlrabi.  On the other hand, we've never grown fennel.  Why?  Well, for one, we don't particularly care for it.  And for two?  We never had any demand indicated for it.  

If someone had asked, we probably would have given it a go.  That's just the way we roll, I guess.

4. The cats aren't (quite) in charge (yet)

But, they WILL sit on things you are about to move.

5.  It takes two PhD's to run a small diversified farm

Ok.  It takes two PhD's to run the Genuine Faux Farm, which just happens to be a small, diversified farm.  Rob is the 'Farm Boss,' and until 2020, he worked full-time at the farm (and is the principle blogger and spreadsheet maker).  His PhD is in Computer Science and Adult Education.  As you can see, he is fully applying his education in this profession.  And, while that is meant to be somewhat facetious, I can tell you that pattern-matching and problem-solving are two skills that are needed in both Computer Science and farming.

Yes, I do keep telling myself that.

Tammy is the 'Queen Boss' on the farm.  Our joke is that when you don't like something, you complain to the 'Farm Boss' and if you do like something, all praise to the 'Queen Boss.'  If you want to get something done, go to the Farm Supervisors (the cats) and they'll tell you to make the two 'bosses' do it.  

While it may not really take two PhD's to run a small diversified farm, it DOES take two PhD's to run THIS small diversified farm.  Rob could not succeed at the Genuine Faux Farm without Tammy (and hopefully she feels the same way about Rob).  The Farm Supervisors do NOT have PhD's, but that's ok because they know everything and didn't need to study.

6. The view on the farm is incredible

There isn't actually a GFF West.  Does this qualify as appropriate for clickbait?  Or is it just silly?

8.  We thrive on variety

We believe in diversity on our farm and we've talked about this topic many times on this blog and elsewhere.  That said, we need to tell you some things that you didn't already know about us....

In 2019, we grew 20 different varieties of lettuce and 30 different varieties of tomatoes.  Most of these were heirloom or heritage varieties.  Since we started in 2004, we have tried approximately 70 different tomato varieties, twelve green bean varieties, fifty lettuce varieties and... well, you get the idea.

We have raised a wide range of veggie cultivars because we know people have different likes and dislikes for taste and texture. We also know that many varieties of the same vegetable type feature different tastes and textures.  A range of cultivars provide us with a form of crop insurance too.  For example, some tomatoes deal with cool seasons better than warm seasons and vice versa.  Since we grow in Iowa, we try to cover our bases so that we have some successful crops each and every season.

10. It has been a while since we did Farmers' Markets

Here is a fact about our farm that we are guessing a number of people who do know about us might not have actually realized.  We have not been involved in a farmers' market for almost seven years now.  We're still amazed that people ask us if we were 'at market.'

9.  We work in all sorts of whether
Tammy says that we work in all sorts of whether because we work
- whether or not it is raining
- whether or not the sun shines
- whether or not the tractor is running
- whether or not it's the 4th of July or Memorial Day or Labor Day
- whether or not we want to on any given day

And that is today's whether report!

11.  There is NO Number 12 on this list.

But, here are some baby chicks.  That usually makes up for it.

11. We like to educate and have a little fun

In case you hadn't noticed, one part of our farm's mission is to educate and inform others about sustainable farming and local foods.  One part of our own personal mission is to enjoy life and have a little fun once in a while.

We also actually like to provide some value with everything we produce - even if we use a 'click bait' type of title to draw you in.  We hope you enjoyed the post and even got something positive out of it. 

Nope, I really am not very good at producing clickbait content.

Best Medicine

As Tammy and I continue our slow recoveries, we are doing our level best to avail ourselves of some of the excellent medicine that we can find around the Genuine Faux Farm.  For example, there is a kitten named Murphy.  Kittens are excellent medicine if you are ailing UNLESS said kitten wants to walk where you are walking AND you are not feeling at all well.  But, other than that, a purring kitten can do wonders.

Of course, flowers and sunshine and a gentle breeze can all have a positive impact too.  Even Friday's gentle rain has healing qualities.

But, we were reminded of the "best medicine" after we told the story of the two of us standing at the bottom of the stairs, hoping the other would go up first... because neither of us had the energy to tackle them at that moment.

After you.  Oh no, after you.  Hee hee hee.  Cough cough cough.

That encouraged me to find a couple of things to promote laughter - and this one fit the bill.  It did more than elicit a chuckle.  

 I hope you got a few laughs if you decided to view it.  I know we did.  Have an excellent remainder of your day.

Too Proud for Words?

The days are still getting longer and the farmer's endurance is not keeping up!  We can only assume I will eventually figure it out.  While I am working on farmwork stamina, I thought I'd give you a brief blog post for your entertainment (and maybe mine as well).

With Anemones Like These....

Who needs friends when you have anemones?

We have a nice little patch of anemones that started out as one plant 16+ years ago.  It might actually be safe to say that these anemones are actually friends of ours.

Asparaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaguuuuuuuuuuuuuuuussssssssssss!

The asparagus is stalking us!

Look, we've seen the cartoon with the reference to the Age of Aquarius song that substitutes Asparagus for Aquarius.  It's funny, ya.  But, why do "Age of Asparagus" when you can do "Eggs and Asparagus?"

So, we got up early on a Saturday, several years ago, for a farmers market.  It was dawn and we were selling eggs and asparagus, eggs and asparagus, aaaaaaaaaaaspaaaaaaaraaaaaaaaaaagussssssssssssssssssss!

You're welcome.

No Trays of Humility

We planted lots for one session, so there.

Yep, sometimes we go on these planting sprees and plant lots of trays.  Shown above is the results of one of those sprees - I don't remember which year the photo is from.

Regardless, we're proud of our efforts on days when we get a bunch of things into trays so they have a chance to grow.   I see no reason for modesty - no trays of humility.

Have a great day!  The groaning of pun aficionados everywhere is appreciated.

Music Festival

 
Tammy and I used to go to a music festival in the Summer.  One of the highlights for several of those festivals was a favorite group of ours, the Choir.  While the picture above is not from that music festival, it does feature the Choir during an indoor concert in the Twin Cities.  

But, I digress...

So, we took several trips in August to Cornerstone Festival in Bushnell, Illinois.  Our interest waned as we moved further away from that destination and the number of people attending the festival made it feel a bit too crowded for our tastes.  And, of course, once we started the Genuine Faux Farm, there wasn't a much chance we were going to add that trip back to our schedules in the middle of the growign season.

In any event, it was a festival that included a campground area, a pond and some lightly wooded areas to go with the open fields.  Multiple tents were set up for a wide range of concerts and activities.  The headlining artists would play at the more permanent stage constructed in a bowl of land that worked as a natural amphitheater.

Thousands of people pitched tents and camped on sight so they could go to various concerts held throughout the grounds over a period of four to five days.

What struck me about the whole thing is that people would sang whenever they wanted, but they never did sing.  Kids ran all over the place, but they would never run.  People spoke with each other, but they never did speak.  We ate our food, but didn't eat. 

Finally I figured it out.  Everywhere people went it was past tents.

Well, I suppose I must be going now.  You know what "they" say.  Time flies like an arrow.  Fruit flies like a banana.

One Size Fits All

 

Incoming!  I suggest you all duck.

Not long after Tammy and I were married, we moved to Madison, Wisconsin.  For those of you who might know a little about the capital of Wisconsin, you might nod in acknowledgement when we say that we first lived on the West side and then the East side and found the culture and environment for each to be distinctly different.

The city looks a bit like two lakes are squishing Madison in the middle, causing it to spill out the sides (east and west).  If you want to get from one side to the other, you either have to go around the north side of Mendota, around the south side of Monona or through the dowtown and area between the two lakes.

feel free to click for a larger image

 Every so often, we would visit State Street, the pedestrian mall (since its conversion in 1974) that was, and is, home to many different kinds of specialty shops.  I especially enjoyed visiting the store that featured music amplifiers, speakers and other sound equipment.

There was a small "hole-in-the-wall" business on State Street that advertised palm reading and other related services.  While this was not our sort of thing, we sometimes would exchange pleasantries with the owner, who liked to sit outside of the shop in hopes of drawing in business.

This fellow was a very short, slightly built individual.  He didn't appear to have any employees and rarely had customers.  We just could not see how he could possibly be making a go of it and sometimes worried that he could not defend himself if a customer got aggessive.  He really was that thin, even to the point of being frail looking.

Well, a few years ago, we heard that this little guy, the proprietor of the fortune telling shop, had been arrested for some "improper business practices."  He was found guilty and sent to a minimum security prison.

More recently, I read an article that said he had managed to escape from that prison!

The headline read:

"Short Fortuneteller Escapes Prison: Small Medium At-Large!"

I wondered if any of the people who had put him in prison were worried about the "wrath of con?"  No?  Not a Trekkie?

Ok, that was stretching a bit anyway.  Have a nice day!  And if you happen to see this guy, he's still on the loose.  That tells me there might be more puns in your future.

The Computer Scientist Strikes!

 

Many of you might know (or maybe you don't) that I actually have a degree in Computer Science.  In fact, I am fond of pointing out that I have a PhD in Computer Science and Adult Education - therefore I farm.  It makes perfect sense.  Sort of.

The justification for the CS to farm connection is that both reward those who have developed skills in problem solving and pattern matching.  As far as the Adult Ed part is concerned, we're still reserving judgement about how that and farming connects successfully.  Perhaps what this means is that I can make excellent spreadsheets for the farm and then be able to explain how they work to someone else.

In any event, I worked for a short time after my graduation with a Bachelor's Degree (this time in math and CS) at Rockwell-Collins in Cedar Rapids.  The company was large enough that I had opportunities to connect with people from various places.  It wasn't an every day sort of thing, but it happened once in a while.

Technology at Rockwell-Collins was all over the place depending on where you worked.  My job focused primarily on a computing system that my college professors had described and then stated that "they were old and we were not likely to end up working on them."  However, there was also cutting edge technology - especially when the bigger contracts came into play and investment was made into that new tech.

At one point, I had a conversation with a guy who worked for Rockwell in Sydney, Australia.  For some reason, we started talking about our work environments.  The area he worked in was in the sub-basement of a building.  I was deep in the middle of a large complex with no windows.  So, we found something to connect on there.  My work space was probably about a half mile away from the nearest window.  Not under ground, but it might as well have been.

After awhile, he told me about the Local Area Network (LAN) setup they had been configuring for the offices there - a fairly new thing at the time.

Of course, they called it the LAN Down Under.

You're welcome!  Have a nice day!

New Month, New Blog Entry

Welcome to a new month and we'll celebrate with a new blog! That seems like a plan, so we're going to do just that.  And to start things off, we'll show you an August picture from the roof of the farm house just to remind us all that there are seasons in Iowa that are not Winter or Mud Season.

New product leaves farmers confused

Every year at the Genuine Faux Farm, we try a new product or two to aid in our food production.  Sometimes the product fits our operation perfectly and it becomes a regular part of our growing system.  Other times, it doesn't work out so well.

This past season, one of the new things was actually an old thing.  We read about a company that sold recycled irrigation drip tape and after calling and asking a few questions, we decided to give it a try.  Perhaps we should have asked more questions.

For those who don't know, drip tape is essentially a flat, plastic hose with slits cut into it every four or six inches.  When connected to a water line, the water expands the line and pushes water slowly through those slits.  Our biggest issue with it is that it eventually ends up in the landfill, like so many other plastic products.  So, we balance our responsible use of water against the use of plastic.  That's why we thought a recycled product would be a good idea.

Another selling point by the company was that, if you opted for it, they would not add extra packaging, like a surrounding plastic seal.  That also sounded good.  So, we ordered and went to pick it up.

Let's just say we were speechless and a bit too surprised when they threw what you see above into the back of the pickup.  It took us a LONG time to untangle all of that.  But, hey, we recycled.

Smart technology not so smart or too smart?

I am the sort of person who is not always pleased when a product I need ends up having extra features that I've never wanted.  My current complaint has to do with my new "smart" phone.  For those who haven't read between the lines yet, my prior phone took a tumble and was having some issues, so we went through the process of acquiring another.  Apparently, I need to spend some time uninstalling some of the apps that came along for the ride with the new one.

I got an email from the Clean Your Desk app with a photo taken by my own phone from its perspective as it sat on my desk.  After doing a little research, I found the promotion material for this product.  The target audience is primarily people who dislike clutter and yet find themselves living with someone who is... um... more clutter accepting than they are.  

So, either Tammy is not accepting of my desk clutter and she somehow stuck this app on my phone OR the artificial intelligence software on the phone has decided I need to clean up my act.  Either way, that app is now uninstalled on my phone. 

Introducing companions

It is pretty well-known by now that we like to use various intercropping techniques at the Genuine Faux Farm.  And when it comes to transplanting young plants into the field, we do things to prepare them for their new life.  This process is often called "hardening off" and it happens as you gradually expose the young plants to harsher conditions - a bit more wind, direct sunshine, rainfall.  

Well, we are now adding an introduction process for companion crops.  In the past, we would have trays of similar crops next to each other after seeding and up until the date of transplant.  The result is that plants that don't know each other end up getting placed in the ground next to someone they don't know.

I don't know about you, but that would be shocking to me!

So, we're adding the process of plant introductions to our hardening off system.  Young marigolds have a chance to mingle with the broccoli and melons (shown above).  The tomatoes get to see the young basil plants with whom they will end up sharing space during the rest of the growing season.  Let the kids play together while they're young so they can figure out how to cooperate when the real work starts!

We'll let you know how this experiment goes.  If fighting breaks out between the hot peppers and the snapdragons, I'm not sure what we'll do.  But, we're going to risk it and hope for the best.

Early season farm tours

Agri-tourism is often an option for small-scale, diversified farms that are looking for an additional income source.  The problem with this is that it can be difficult to identify agri-tourism feature that both fits the farm, the farmers and interests people enough to visit.

At the Genuine Faux Farm, we often do not have enough person hours to farm AND provide farm experiences during the growing season.  So, we are proposing the offering of farm tours prior to the start of the warmer months.  Shown above is Farmer Rob giving a tour of one of our high tunnels just after the first planting of the season in that high tunnel.

Over here, on your right, is some soil.  That soil has seeds planted in it.  And next to that is... some soil that has some seeds planted in it.  By my feet, is a hose.  And...  what?

Not riveting enough?  Hey!  What can be more exciting than the ability of a seed to grow into a full-sized plant.  

No, you can't stay here and watch until the plant reaches maturity.  Unless you work for the chance to do so, of course.  But, you'll have to wait for food until the plants produce something...

Industrial strength paper weights

Speaking of people visiting the farm, it has long been our policy to remind the leaders of visiting groups to tell participants that temperatures at the farm are usually cooler and winds are typically higher than they are in town.  This does explain - in part - why I often have more layers of clothing than most people when I do venture into town.

As far as the wind thing goes, it does become a problem if you want to do anything with paper outside - or if your windows in the house are open. There have been numerous times where I use an object to hold something in place, only to have the wind mock my efforts by flipping the heavier item over and taking the paper object for a ride.  

This is where a recent harvest of old cement is going to come in handy at the Genuine Faux Farm.  Worried about something blowing away?  Just grab a slab of cement.  If the piece you select is a little to large for the task, meander on in to the truck barn and find the pick ax.  Knock off a chunk that fits your need and away you go!

New sunflower bush variety

Since we started some seed production at the Genuine Faux Farm a few years ago we've been playing with some plant breeding.  We've found that the hardest part is getting different plants that aren't the same cultivar interested in each other.  That might be another reason for the intercropping introduction program we mentioned earlier.  If we can get the marigolds and the basil and the tomatoes to cross we could sell plants that provide a base for spaghetti sauce - all in one.

In any event, we apparently came up with some sort of mixture that resulted in a tall, bush-like sunflower plant.  It was pretty prolific with the flowers and the Goldfinches loved it.  It's really too bad that our goal was to select for a lettuce variety.

I think we may have missed the mark in this case.

Well, well, well... what day is it again?

Make a farmer (me) happy and tell me that I might have had you at least a LITTLE BIT convinced that some of these were true.  And while you do that, take a look at the calendar and consider the date.  The first day of April is always fraught with the danger when it comes to the Genuine Faux Farm blog.

Here are the previous April Fool's posts:

Annual April Fool's Posts

• 2022's Post
  
• 2021's Post
  
• 2020's Post
  
• 2019's Post
  
• 2018's Post
  
• 2017's Post *only have time to check out one?  this is my favorite of the prior issues*
  
• 2016's Post
• 2015's Post
• 2014's Post
• 2013's Post
• 2012's Post

Have a great April everyone!

Monday, Monday

It has been a while since the chalk door in the Truck Barn saw regular use.  It was a regular thing to have a work list posted there so those who were toiling at the Genuine Faux Farm that day new what was on the docket.   Every so often, I would wax poetic...

For those who can't read the picture shown above:

"We like Mondays

Mondays are good

Some don't like them

Like maybe we should

Today is Monday

We work on a farm

Do a good job

It's good for the karm...a"

I include this picture in our blog just to show everyone that we have always done our best to maintain a sense of humor during the busiest times. It is also a recognition that today is, in fact, Monday.  Yes, we try to maintain our sense of humor on Mondays too.

Well, at least the day this blog entry is scheduled to be published is a Monday.  The day I wrote this blog was NOT Monday.  And maybe the day you read the post is not Monday either.  So, if it is not Monday when you read this, just pretend it is for as long as it takes to get the feeling of the post and then go about your day in whatever way you consider to be normal.

Proof that Farmer Rob has actually done farm work

I recently found myself sharing some stories about conversations that I have had while staffing our farm table at farmers' markets.  I tell the story about the person who wondered why there was dirt on our potatoes more often than any other, but I recalled these and thought they could be told today.

Once we added high tunnels to our farm, we worked hard to get certain types of produce out much earlier so we could provide a bit more diversity in product.  This was especially true in June, when the Spring crops are starting to struggle with warmer weather, but the warm-weather crops are not typically ready.   

The first year we succeeded in producing some excellent early broccoli and green beans (among other things), we had a conversation with a person who looked at some of our June produce and was incredulous.

"You didn't grow this?!?"
"Yes ma'am, I did grow this."
"How could you have?  You didn't grow this!"
"I'm sorry, but what do you mean?  I assure you, we grew this on our farm."
"But, it looks so good!"
"Um..... thank you?"

I'm still not sure what to think of that exchange.  But, they did buy something from us - so we'll take it as a compliment.

During a different season an individual was emphatic that we HAD NOT grown the produce we had on the table.  This particular farmers' market had rules that you had to produce what you sold.  You could not go to a produce auction, or the store, or wherever... and buy produce and resell it at your farmers' market table.

Now, before you discount this - let me tell you that this IS actually a thing.  People do that.  How do you think some farmers' markets have vendors selling things like watermelons weeks before they could possibly be ripe and ready in Iowa?  Well, they have a connection with someone in Missouri or Arkansas or the local grocer, that's how.  Let me also tell you that I am not fond of people doing that - especially when they do it in a way that makes you think they grew it, even when they did not.

In any event, the accusation that we had not grown the broccoli and green beans we had that particular season was a bit more serious than you might think.  Especially when this could result in our being expelled from the market.  While that might be a bad thing, it was worse for me because I really did not (and do not) like it when people resell product and represent it as their own.  So, to be accused of doing something I really find to be dishonest and .. well... bad... 

Let's just say it didn't go down well with me.

So, I made the suggestion that, if they would like, they could come visit our farm and I could show them where we grew these things.

They made a bold statement that they didn't need to see our farm to know that we hadn't grown this produce.

I offered that I would gladly take pictures and provide growing records.  After all, to be certified organic (which we were) I had to maintain records of planting, cultivation, fertilization, irrigation, harvest and post-harvest handling.  I could tell them more information about the product than they would ever want.

So, they declared that I was a liar and they "harumphed" their way away from us.  And nothing more came of it.

Perhaps they hadn't liked their Mondays like they should?

Well, I hope you (and I) have a good Monday, or whatever day it is that you read this!  Thanks for reading and remember to give someone a specific compliment today.

Minding Your Peas and Cukes

As our farm changes, we reconsider what we will grow and how much of those things we will grow each year.  I know we both love our snow peas and we have a variety of snow peas we really appreciate.  It seems to like to get a start in the high tunnel and then it really takes off when we move the building off of the plants.  

So, we'll be planting snow peas this year.  I guess you could say we are...

Giving Peas a Chance

Young peas at the right, carrots at the left (mid May)

Peas are one of those crops that farms like ours don't often focus on.  The tomatoes, especially when you grow a range of heirlooms, are attractive and easy to talk about.  Lettuce has so many different varieties and they can look very different from one to the next.  If you live in Iowa, you typically have a place in your heart for sweet corn.

I have yet to see a session offered at a farming conference (such as PFI) that focused on growing peas, but we will happily talk about lettuce, tomatoes, squash and numerous other crops.

The reality is that peas do not typically provide high yields per row foot, but they do represent a fairly high cost in terms of labor during harvest.  If you're a small farm with limited resources, peas might not be worth the chance.  In our case, we like the bridge peas give us in late June and early July to the green beans.  But, the overlap between the two can certainly test one's picking patience.

We like to get the peas in the ground around April 30 and earlier if we start them in the high tunnel.  Ideally the four inch soil temperature in the mid-50's gives us good germination.  We focus on pod peas (snow) and stopped growing shell peas years ago.  The return on shelling peas was so low that we couldn't justify trying them any more.

Peas de Resistance

Trying to get a jump on trellising

All of our work having to do with peas is focused around the harvest.  I suppose, you could say this is true for all of our crops if you think about it.  But, we trellis our peas primarily to make the harvest easier and reduce our harvest time.  If we didn't trellis them, we could still get peas and the plants wouldn't suffer too much.  

If you've ever tried to harvest peas that weren't trellised well, you might be tempted to write a book about...

War and Peas

And, in fact, there is a kids book with that title by Michael Foreman.  You can listen to it here.

We've also had some issues with wind blowing some of the vines off of the trellising.

Two rows of peas with nowhere to go?

 

When the vines fall off or otherwise evade our trellis efforts, you could say we have an issue with...

Escapeas!

 

Our trellising technique when we grew as much as eight hundred row feet of peas was a bit of a project, but once it was done, it worked pretty well.  We started with cattle panels at the ends of our 200 foot rows.  This provided and anchor for the Hortnova fencing that ran the rest of the length of the row.  It also provided a barrier against the deer that occasionally like to taste our peas.  So, you could say that the cattle panels provide us with some...

Peas of Mind

Mammoth Melting Peas

 

We have found that the taller vining plants, such as the Mammoth Melting Pea actually prefers the cattle panels to the Hortnova fencing.  As a result, we actually provided cattle panels for the whole length of the row.  Since we put these on the outside rows, this also provided a barrier to the deer.

Blizzard, another pea variety, doesn't seem to care how it is trellised.  But, if the tellis is too loose and rolls over on itself it causes problems.  If you can't quite see how this might be an issue, we'd like you to....

Visualize Whirled Peas

These Blizzard pea plants want you to know that they do not endorse Rob's puns.

In any event, when we have a cooler June and July this provides a great situation for peas planted in the field.  During the years when that happened, we really brought in nice harvests.  Our very best year was 2015, when we brought in about 450 pounds of snow peas from 600 hundred row feet.

Which means we can talk a bit about...

Peas and Prosperity

Oregon Sugar Pod II - consistently reliable.

Our baseline for pea production is about 50 pounds for 100 row feet of peas.  That's what we expect if everything goes well.  And, most seasons, something goes wrong.  For example, in 2013, the Mammoth Melting seeds were not pure, so the peas they produced were not snow peas and did NOT taste good.  On the other hand, Oregon Sugar Pod II has been pretty consistent at 57 to 65 pounds per 100 feet.  The big issue with them are the...

Inner Peas
Well, we had gone so long without a pun, I had to get one in there.  Here's the deal.  Oregon Sugar Pod II is the most heat tolerant, shortest vine, standard snow pea we have grown.  But, unlike Blizzard, it likes to hold many of its peas inside the leaf canopy, which makes it a bit more difficult to harvest.

Spend time amongst the peas and you get to enjoy their flowers.

But, when you actually find that pod sitting deep in the vines, you get tempted to yell...

I Gotta Pea

If you are not in our CSA, then you might not have been pointed to this song by Brent Odom. 

Yes, yes, we know that this type of song is typical of a ten year old's sense of humor.  Therefore, it makes sense that Rob is posting it.

This reminds me of a person I met some time ago at a park.  She liked to sing the alphabet song while shelling peas.  She also had a small tank where she raised minnows for fishing.  Since her name was Ella, she taught us to sing the alphabet song this way.  ABCDEFGHIJK... 

Ella Minnow Pea

I suppose many of you are in some amount of pain by now, so I will get back to talking about our peas. 

Golden Sweet Peas - easier to pick and great taste.

Golden Sweet Peas like the cooler weather and very much prefer to be trellised well.  In most production years, we didn't give them the full attention they deserved but they have a great taste raw or cooked.  The yellow-green color makes the peas stand out from the vines and make it easier to pick.  But, many people aren't sure if the peas are good because the pale color looks a bit anemic. 

Peas Believe Me

Golden Sweet Peas are very tasty.  Rob does not typically eat raw veggies in the field, but he'll make an exception for these.  In fact, he'll eat any one of thes varieties of snow peas we have grown raw or cooked and can tell you that each has their own taste.  The Blizzard and Golden Sweet Peas have the most tender pods of the batch.  Blizzard can be very sweet tasting and Golden Sweet is in between Blizzard and a standard snow pea (Oregon Sugar Pod) for taste.  Mammoth Melting is fine raw but even better in stir fries or steamed since it has a pod that can be a bit tougher.

Hopefully we'll have a good year with our pea crop.  If we do, we might have some available for YOU.  If you buy more than you would need for one meal, you can have extra.  Then one night you can go home, find some leftovers - just a little of this and that - to have...

A Peas Meal.
 

For the longest time we had a tagline that was, of course, pun based.

Minding Your Peas and Cukes

I think it was actually fairly popular.  We gauge such things by the volume of the collective groaning heard from those who are reading it. 

One time, I was out weeding between the carrots and peas and had one of those moments that occurs every so often in the country where there is very little noise.  I guess you could say I had some 

Peas and Quiet

I also noted that this must be a very good year for peas since there were some vining into adjacent bell pepper plants.  If those vines choke out the bell peppers but result in top quality peas, you might say we won the

No Bell Peas Prize

The Blizzard peas STILL do not endorse Rob's puns

In order to appease you (see what I did there?  You did... ups, sorry), we will actually provide you with some interesting information. After all, I've been told I'm full of it.

For example, we do not actually grow peas and peppers in the same area, so happily, we should not have pea vines choking out our peppers.  Needless to say, the trellising helps contain the pea vines somewhat.  But, since the peas grow vertical, they tend to have a shade zone.  Peppers like their sun, so a shade zone might not be helpful to our bell peppers.  As a result, we interplant bush beans with peppers and we have tried some clover as well.

I was just thinking.  Most people seem to like baby animals.  How about 'baby' plants?  Would you find young pea plants to be...

A pea ling?

Ahem.  Moving on.

Since this is supposed to be a post about peas AND cukes, we'd like you to know that the cukes...

Look Just Vine to Us!

Lovely coverage and texture.. soon everyone will decorate with them!

In the picture above, the plants were only just started producing, but the vines were really covering ground.  The season for cucumber yoga had begun!  We do not trellis our cucumbers, which means Rob had to do a fair amount of contorting to pick cucumbers and not destroy vines or fruit in the process.  In short, it can be a fair amount of exercise. 

And, in case you didn't know, peas can get you exercise as well.  We are considering marketing a new hot drink that combines peas and coffee.  You exercise while drinking it (maybe doing cucumber yoga?).  I think we'll call it...

Pea Lattes!

You're welcome.  And have a fine day - assuming you survived this blog post.

Daylight Savings Solutions

 

When it comes to the controversy that is Daylight Savings Time and the bi-annual shift between Standard and Daylight time, we are a split household.  My opinion is that we should just pick a time (Daylight or Standard) and stick to it.  Tammy's is that she sees a benefit to to each.  She likes the sun to be up well prior to her 9 AM classes in December.  So, she's got a point there.  If we were to choose Daylight Savings time for the whole year, the latest sunrise would be about 8:40 AM (with official "dawn" being about a half-hour earlier).

And, I guess there is the "issue" of dawn arriving at 4AM in June if we stick with Standard time. 

It's only because the switch between Daylight Savings Time and Standard Time seems to mess with me and my own internal time clock so much that she might be willing to agree to stick with one or the other.  

Some of you might recall that this is not the first time I have offered up a set of possible Daylight Savings Solutions.  But, since it is upon us yet again, I couldn't help myself!  I am re-sharing previous solutions (with some edits) and adding in some more!  

That, and I wanted to share some nice sunset and sunrise pictures, so I added them in too!

Let's have a little fun! 

Option 1: Give the night shift the daylight

All of those fine people who get stuck with the "graveyard shift" deserve a break.  How about we simply switch around AM and PM?  Now the night time hours would be the sunlit hours!

All of those folks who have had to deal with working without the benefit of the sun will suddenly be able to step out during break and catch a few rays.  And, isn't it time the rest of us learned what it is like to work our shifts during the hours when the sun is shining on the other side of the earth?

Option 2: Ease the shock of the time change with incremental time changes

One of the reasons I struggle with the time change so much is that we make this big, one-hour shift all at once.  As the sunrise happens a little earlier each day in the early Spring, I find myself getting up a little earlier each day with minimal fuss and bother.  So, let's EASE into Daylight Savings!  Maybe it will convert people like myself into believers that DST is a good idea.

Starting March 1st, we should add one minute to the time each day until, after 60 days, we've reached the one hour mark.  Ha ha!  Now we're where we want to be for the longest days of the year.  Then, we subtract one minute each day for sixty days in the Fall!

I can't see any difficulties with this proposal - can you?  I mean, it's simple.  Though we might get tired of all of the "set your clocks ahead (or back) one minute" reminders for 120 days of the year.

Option 3: Provide an opt-out policy

Let's let everyone PICK whether they want to participate in either Daylight Savings or Standard Time.  If the time switch really bugs a person, they can sign a personal "opt-out" form.

We can then have two segments of the population that reside in the same area in two different time zones.  Think of the fun and excitement we could have with this!

That office meeting that happens every week is now going to have to have two meeting times published if you want everyone to attend together.  However, this could also be a way to split things up and give everyone more opportunity!  The high school varsity baseball teams could have a game at 7pm for the DST'ers and a 7pm game for the ST'ers.  Twice as many kids get to play!!  Though I suspect there may be some issues with the use of the ball diamond.

And given our tendency of late to take sides on practically any issue and make it personal, this might just be a recipe for disaster.

Option 4: Go half-way

Do you have some of the complaints Tammy has regarding sticking with either Daylight Savings or Standard Time?  Would you rather not have the sun come up after you've gotten to work in the winter or have it pop up just after you've finally gotten to sleep?

Here's a solution for you!

Let's just move each time zone half way between the two!  Pick the half-way mark, moving 30 minutes forward from Standard and then stay there with no further changes.

Option 4a: Adjust for popular opinion

Or, we could be a bit more innovative!

Let's have everyone vote for which of the two times they like better - Standard or Daylight Savings.  Then, based on the vote, we move the time.  For example, if 66% vote for Daylight Savings and 33% for Standard, we just move 40 minutes forward from Standard (or about 66% of the distance between the two).

See?!? Everyone got a say in the matter AND we're able to make a numerically supported compromise!  

Option 5: Spice it up and let every state just pick a time measuring method

Hey!  Why don't we do what we seem to like to do with so much of our governing in the United States?  Let's let every state pick how they want to do things.  Surely that will make everyone happy.  I mean, doesn't this approach ALWAYS make everyone happy?

No?

Huh.

Option 6: Go back to sundials

As an introvert, I actually like the idea of sundials.  

First, if it is a really cloudy day, you have to cancel all of your scheduled meetings because NOBODY will know what time it is.  And, second, you can really mess with peoples' sense of time during the night-time hours.  Only those folks who work the night shift will know what's going on.  The rest of us will be completely lost.

Option 7: Use the "Farmer Time" method

To be perfectly clear - I've learned to rely more on the arrival and existence of daylight to tell me when to do things on the farm.  Sometimes the construct that is time zones just gets in my way.

Sun's up?  Time to get up and let the animals out, give them food and water, and just start "doing stuff."  Sun's going down?  Time to put the animals away, put the equipment away, and perhaps do something that is not farm-related for a while - like sleep. 

If you don't want to work the same hours as a farmer, the solution is simple.  Make a calendar that tells you how many hours and minutes of daylight you have each day - then slice off chucks of it for work and for play.  You can either count from the point the sun is at its highest or you can count from dawn or dusk - you pick. 

Works great - unless you live in Alaska.  If you're waiting on sunrise to tell you it is time to get to work in the winter months, you may have a problem - and you'll NEVER quit working in the summer months.  

I guess you could figure out this hibernation thing other critters do. 

Option 8: Time zone trials

Are you the kind of person who really hates to buy something before you actually have tried it?  If so, you might like this idea!

Let's allow communities a chance to test drive different time zones to see which one fits best!  It could also be a great way to travel without physically leaving where you are.  Want to visit London? Just shift to Greenwich Mean Time for a while!  Or maybe you just had a REALLY GOOD day - you could switch to a time zone that's a few hours earlier and extend that day a bit!

What do you mean that wouldn't work?

Option 9: How about a lottery?

It seems to me that an inordinate number of people like to gamble on all sorts of things - why not gamble on the time zone approach that your locality will be using?

To make this even more realistic, let's first take a poll to find out what the most popular choices would be.  Then, we need to set things up so those choices are LESS likely to be selected.

The basic idea is that only a couple of REALLY lucky people will be happy with the solution.  Everyone else.... loses.

Option 10: Use the sands of time.

We can learn to appreciate or come to despise the sands of time if only we all started carrying an hourglass around instead of watches or phones.  Obviously, it has to be a big enough hourglass for each person to be able to keep track of time for the entire day.  I realize this is something like the idea of having everyone set their own time zone - but I wanted to offer up this option because I learned something cool when I first wrote about these Daylight Savings Solutions.

The largest hourglass is reported to be in Budapest, Hungary.  It measures one year of time and weighs 60 tons.  Happily, an hourglass for one day would be a bit smaller than that.  In fact, you can get a 4-hour hourglass and it is "only" 18 inches tall.  I realize this would not be a perfectly linear equation, but that puts a daylong hourglass somewhere in  the range of six-feet tall.

I hope these things would come with wheels - and turning them over for the new day might be a bit of a production.  That big, Hungary hourglass takes four people hauling on cables 45 minutes to get it turned for the new year.

But, I suspect enough of us make New Year's resolutions to get into better shape.  Why not make it necessity to turn over a six-foot tall glass each day?

Option 11: Move the people with the time

Well, if most people don't like the time change, I have another idea that would NOT require that we make ANY changes to our current system of cycling between Daylight Savings and Standard Time.  Keep all of that the same.

Instead, we should make people move from time zone to time zone so they do not have to adjust their clocks - they just have to adjust to a new home and new location.  

I suppose there might be an issue when we start pushing people on either coast into the ocean, but we all have to make sacrifices if we want to solve this problem.

Option 12: Double or nothing

Here's an option for those of us who are always complaining that time goes by too quickly.  Or for those folks who say "wait a minute" and they really need two minutes.  Let's just double the length of all of our time units.  Make each second twice as long, each minute twice as long, each hour twice as long...

I think you get the picture.

How does this solve the Daylight Savings issue?  Well, you just get rid of it.  The swing between longest and shortest days of the year just got cut in half!  Tammy's complaint with the sun not coming up in time to start the work day is moot because now the sun will come up around 4 am even during the shortest days!  And yes, it will still be up well into the evening hours.

If you really like sunrise or sunset, you can get TWO of each of these every day with this plan.  Just think!  You could double your productivity!  A two week vacation would be TWICE as long.  Your favorite holidays could truly be savored because you have double the time to enjoy.  You could even eat TWICE as much in one day!

For those of you who like to take naps, it will be dark in the middle of the day.  So, taking a nap just got easier too!  

On the other hand, if you think a one-hour meeting is bad now...  And while the wait in the doctor, dentist, whomever's waiting area was only fifteen minutes, it was a LOOOONG fifteen minutes.

Option 13: Split it in two

Okay, be honest now.  After Option 12, you just HAD to see this one coming, didn't you?

Let's split each day into two pieces.  One part will be called "night" and the other will be called "day."  We just count time from the beginning of whichever part we're in.

Unfortunately, this then brings us to the debate as to when day and night actually "officially begin."  Is it during Civil Twilight, Nautical Twilight, Astronomical Twilight or Official Sunrise/Sunset?

Well, at least we have the hope of having more than two sides to that argument, won't we?

Solving the worlds problems, one at a time

It turns out that, according to this poll, only 28% of people in the United States actually favor this swapping back and forth between Daylight Savings and Standard Time.  On the other hand, they can't agree on which way we should go.  While 40% prefer that we stick with Standard Time, 31% would prefer to stay with Daylight Savings.

Clearly, this is a difficult situation that calls for my unique style of problem solving.  See how quickly and easily I came up with fourteen, count them, FOURTEEN (remember 4a?) solutions for this very knotty and clearly divisive problem.

Now that I've provided the world with this service, which problem should I tackle next?  

If you have ideas - put them in the comments, I'll get right on it!